Guides

How to get a conversation out of WhatsApp, what goes wrong on the way, and what it becomes once it is on paper. Written by the person who wrote the software that reads these files.

GuidesAll 14

Export chat is missingAdvanced Chat Privacy is almost always the answer. How to confirm it, and what to ask for.The 40,000-message capWhy long chats come out short, and how to export a decade in pieces without buying software.Opening _chat.txtUnzip it, read it, and understand the timestamps, the arrows and the invisible characters.Export on Android⋮ → More → Export chat → Include media. Plus where the zip actually goes afterwards.Export on iPhoneIt hides behind the contact's name, not the menu. Attach Media, then Save to Files.Missing photos in an export“Media omitted”, offloaded iCloud files, and the ones that really are gone for good.Exporting a groupSame four taps, a bigger file, an admin who can veto it — and other people's privacy.Chat to PDFThree routes, honestly compared — including the free one that needs no service at all.Printing WhatsApp messagesFour methods from free-and-instant to bound-and-permanent, with the trade-offs stated.Keeping the messages of someone who diedWhat happens to their account, how long you have, and how to keep the voice notes.How many pages will mine be?Rough numbers by chat length, what inflates a count, and when a chat becomes a set of volumes.Printing at a local shopThe spec sheet to hand over, what to check, and why this beats international shipping.Dark-mode chat booksIt looks like 2am and it costs more to print. The honest trade, and when light wins.Chat books in South AfricaPriced in rand, made in Durban, and bindable at a shop down the road.

ComparisonsAll 5

Gift guidesAll 6

ToolsAll 22

Booklet imposerSaddle-stitch imposition: print duplex, fold the stack, staple once. In your browser.2-up imposerCut-stack imposition: two pages a side, one cut, left pile on right pile.Spine calculatorPage count and paper to millimetres of spine — plus the full flat cover width.Blank-page inserterFix recto starts and odd totals by adding the blanks into the file itself.Page reverserFor printers that output face-up and hand you the book back-to-front.Signature plannerPages to signatures — counts, ranges and blanks, in sewing order.Case calculatorThe hand-bound hardcover's full cut list: boards, spine, hinges, cloth.Yardage calculatorCloth cuts to roll metres — books per metre, metres per run.Weight calculatorPages and paper to grams — block, covers, boards itemised.Paper convertergsm ⇄ pounds across all five US basis weights — exactly.Spine text fitTitle to spine width — the largest honest point size.Words → pagesWord count to book pages — then sheets, spine and weight.Cover builderFront, spine, back images to a flat wraparound at true millimetres.De-imposerBooklet PDFs back to reading order — the exact inverse of the imposer.Spread splitterOne guillotine stroke through every page — spreads become singles.Signature splitterOne zipped file per signature, named in sewing order.Scan rebuilderFronts + reversed backs interleaved — the book-scan fix.Folio stamperPage numbers in book convention — outer corners, honest skips.Crop marks & bleedTrim marks and 3 mm bleed, drawn where the blade expects them.Zine imposerEight pages, one sheet, two folds, one cut, zero staples.Margin inspectorPages rendered with trim and safe-area guides over them.Chat statisticsWho writes more, when it wakes, what it says in emoji.

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